Edmond Theisen

Edmond Theisen
(Colorado Crushers, Linebacker)
Player ID #40
Nickname(s)	Eddie
Colorado Crushers
Jersey #	53
Gender	Male
Species	Cattle / Edgerton
Details
Born On	(1990-10-11) October 11, 1990
Height	6.33 feet (1.93 m)
Weight	275 lb (125 kg)
Throws	Right
Hometown	Walpole, NH, USA
College	Edgerton College
Career Info
Draft	2015 / Round: 2 / Pick: 20th
Drafted by Chicago
Years Pro	7
Awards	2018 United Pro Bowl Team

Edmond Theisen is a linebacker for the Colorado Crushers in the UFFL.

History

Edmond Theisen was born and raised just outside of the small village of Walpole, New Hampshire - about as far from any major city as you can imagine. At least, that's how he feels about it when asked. He lived on a farm with his 11 siblings, mother, father and paternal grandparents - which is one extremely crowded farmhouse. Unfortunately, the family had the one-tracked mindset of 'raise children, make money, sustain ourselves and pass on the farm when we grow old'. Several of his siblings would become milk maids or tend to the chickens. Fate changed when he was 9 years old. His brother Robert ignored his father's pressing requests and left the family to pursue another life by going to college, taking all his belongings in the middle of the night. "Eddie" was inspired by his brother's actions, and as he loved sports - particularly football - he tried out for the middle school team. He wanted nothing more than to be able to find a place for himself outside of a life cemented on a farm, working for his father and with no hopes of a future beyond the boundaries of the valley farmland. So, he pushed himself to succeed in football. By high school, he was performing well as a powerful center. He overcame adversity, being one of the few bovine players on the team, and dealing with a new head football coach in his senior year of high school. He was a highly effective blocker, and given his bulky stature, he could easily give the swifter opponents a hard time making it to the quarterback. The rest of his team was just slightly above average. Eddie quickly bloomed, emerged as the lead guy for his school outside of football, and led his team to a playoff berth and State Championship game in 2009. His parents were proud, but still expectant of him to return to the farm - so his scholarship to college was his ticket out. He went on to Edgerton, a small community college outside of Plymouth, New Hampshire - an hour from Walpole. Here he shared the Center role but delved into linebacker, where he was much more successful and landed the permanent position in his sophomore year. He led the conference his Junior year (2012) in tackles per game (11.2), tipped passes per game (3.2), and sacks (0.7) per game.

Eddie Theisen wants to pursue a full-time career in the UFFL to solidify a life far away from the constraints of his family farm. He hopes to be drafted to somewhere far away from the Appalachians where he can play as a Linebacker or Center. "Ever since I was half my size, I wanted nothing but to be out of there (home). Nobody these days wants to be stuck on a farm for all eternity... I love football, and I'm not sure what I'll do if they (the UFFL) turn me down," said Theisen in a post-game interview a few months ago. "Perhaps become one of those pencil pushers in a factory?" he joked.

Contract Info

Player Manager	itsamadworld919
Salary (Per Year)	$10000000
Current Contract Ends on	April 1st, 2024

Statistics

Individual

Year	Team	GS	Tackles	Tackles for Loss	Coverages	Sacks	INTs	Forced Fumbles	Recoveries
2014	CHI	16	87	7	8	8	1	4	1
2015	CHI	16	133	3	-	2	1	4	1
2016	CHI	16	126	1	-	7	0	1	0
2017	CHI	16	143	4	-	7	3	1	0
2018	CHI	16	123	4	5	13	0	0	0
2019	CHI

Win-Loss Record

Total Record: 48-32

2014	5-11
2015	11-5
2016	10-6
2017	12-4
2018	10-6